“When Mohammed Rafi Sahib folded his hands in front of me and apologized, I was in shock!”
By Kavita A Chhibber
(All photographs courtesy of Kavita Krishnamurti Subramaniam and respective photographers.)
It is her Birthday today, and the lovely lady who shared this story and more is a legend in her field, with a massive body of work, which is not just limited to Indian film music. She is one of those rare artists whose humility, positive energy, is contagious. Despite an ongoing battle with various respiratory issues for decades, her voice just turns magical when she records or sings live on stage. In fact, I have personally seen her struggling with a cough or a bronchial infection backstage and wondered how she was going to pull it off and sing a full concert?
But then she showed up on stage and belted out “Om Namah Shivaye” like she had borrowed some superhero’s lungs. And moved me to tears.
In a deluge of inauthentic people ripping each other to pieces in the world of art and entertainment and beyond, trying to show off how great they are, Kavita Krishnamurti Subramaniam is a rare artist whose genuine humility, thoughtfulness and gratitude to the divine that carved her incredible journey is something that has stayed with me.
It is often that we fall in love with and put our heroes on a pedestal only to find out that they have feet of clay. I can honestly say Kavita Krishnamurti Subramaniam is even more full of loving kindness than I had imagined her to be. And a great idol and ideal to follow on and offstage.
I don’t think she remembers this meeting, but in the early 2000s, Kavita ji came to Atlanta with her husband, the legendary violinist Dr L. Subramaniam because he was performing at an event that was headlining two other legends apart from him – Pandit Jasraj and Ustad Zakir Hussain. I saw Kavita ji backstage, ran to her and introduced myself (something I rarely do. I am a stickler for protocol and need to be introduced properly to whomever I’m supposed to interview) . I told her I would be honored to interview her. I didn’t even have a pen, having left my handbag in the green room. She didn’t know me at all, but with zero attitude, she pulled out an eyeliner pencil and scribbled her phone number on my ticket. And of course, the penciled number became smudged and unreadable. So the interview didn’t happen then.
But I’m a firm believer in destiny and our paths crossed again. It resulted in a conversation that lasted close to five hours. Kavita ji was surprised at the amount of research I had done. I said to her that one session won’t be enough and she said so kindly, “You have worked so hard. I will do as many sessions as possible until you are happy with the conversation.” Well, there is still so much more to talk about. And I hope more conversations will ensue because you will see how inspiring and positive she is. It’s something which this world needs even more today.
This is a conversation I have not shared before, and I feel so happy to share Part 1 today because January 25th is also, as I said, Kavita ji’s birthday.
Pure souls, enlightened, good human beings never finish last because they don’t get into the rat race and Kavita ji’s life from her birth has been a blessed one. “I had an exceedingly happy childhood. It was unique in the sense, I was born to a South Indian family, but we were two families living together. My adopted parents were Bengalis (Protima and Nikhil Bhattacharya). So we had an unshakable belief in each other and a very, very deep friendship. They had one daughter who is my didi Nandita and I was born after three sons. We were four children here and one there. So five of us were brought up together. There were two kitchens, one was ours, a vegetarian kitchen, and one was a Bengali kitchen. I can’t tell you the amount of love I got from two mothers and two fathers and my brothers, my siblings, we were all very close to each other. It was a big open house where of course the rule was that there was enough money for me to train in music and to buy books. But no money was given to buy extra toys or anything excessive. During our childhood, there was no television. So, we ended up playing pitthu, cricket with the entire family in the big field outside our home.”
The family found a wonderful music teacher in Balram Puri who made learning music magical for Kavita ji’s brother and her. Master ji, as he was called, would bring records and introduced her to the great stalwarts of classical music and great singers like Lata Mangeshkar. “Master ji was God’s representative in our life. He used to bring records and say ‘This is Amir Khan Saab’s recording. You must listen to Amir Khan Saab.’ Then he would say, ‘You know this is a new singer Bhimsen Joshi and you must listen to him. This is Kishori Amonkar. Now listen to the song of Lata ji composed by Jaidev. He would talk to us, he would tell us jokes, he would tell us stories.”
“He was so passionate about teaching, and such a fine, sensitive musician. And you know, now when I think back, he taught us so many small bandish (a specific, structured melodic composition), which now I hear so many other people performing as classical musicians. He made everything so much fun, and he inculcated deep love for music in us. It became such an important part of our lives that we could not think of life without music. To make an 8-year-old child sit patiently for 2-3 hours for music was just not easy, To make her fall so deeply in love with it shows what an extraordinary teacher he was.”
Kavita ji soon started winning school competitions and her aunt decided to take Kavita ji to Mumbai to learn music properly, against the wishes of everyone else.
“The only person we knew in Mumbai was Hema Malini and her mother who was a close friend of my aunt’s, so we went there and the adventure began. My aunt was very protective, but life was a lot simpler and people in the 70s were extremely helpful. I had a Rakhi brother in Mumbai. He was a very close friend of my family. His name was Vijay Padukone. He was the youngest brother of Guru Dutt ji so when I came to Bombay he said, to my aunt, ‘I’ll take her to St Xaviers college and enroll her.’ He told me ‘You will sing your first jingle for me, you know, so that you get some income.'”
“St. Xaviers was a college where children of many people from the film industry studied. And for many events, they would invite musicians, actors, directors to be the Chief Guest. I used to sing for college competitions and won a few prizes.” That’s where the great music director and singer Hemant Kumar and Amin Sayani, one of India’s most famous RJs and radio announcers, got to hear Kavita ji. Amin Sayani invited her to his office in Colaba and Hemant Kumar asked her to come and sing for his concerts because his own daughter wasn’t interested.
Amin Sayani asked Kavita ji’s aunt, “‘What is the real objective of your being here? Do you want her to make a lot of money?’ My aunt responded. ‘I want her to learn how to sing well. And if she does, then money will come.'”
Amin Sayani immediately understood and appreciated the lack of greed, lack of being over ambitious and pushy. He immediately gave them a letter for the famous music director duo of Shankar Jaikishan and connected them to Master Musician C. Ram Chandra. By the time they tried to meet Shankar Jaikishan, Jaikishan had already passed away.
They met C. Ramchandra, who after hearing Kavita ji, said she still had to learn a lot and to bring her back in 8 or 10 years. But four years later Kavita ji started singing with him. When she reminded him about his saying she should come back in 8-10 years he had a hearty laugh.
“So, you know, I didn’t have to knock on doors at all. Hemant Kumar in turn introduced me to Manna Dey and told him, “You must take this girl to accompany you in concerts. She will be very good with you on stage.'”
A big moment came very early on, when Hemant Kumar suddenly called Kavita ji and asked her to miss college that day and come to Raj Kamal Studios. “He taught me a few lines of a Bengali song and while I was in the waiting room, the doors opened and Lataji (the great legend Lata Mangeshkar) walked in. I can’t express what I felt when I saw this Goddess of music walking in and then I sang 2 lines with her. Honestly, I cannot imagine children getting a break like this in this generation. Firstly, there are too many people singing now. In my time, girls who came from musical families, were the ones who came into the industry. My kind of middle-class children, a South Indian girl who was a government officer’s daughter coming to the film industry, was not a very common phenomenon at all.”
Many new artists started their careers dubbing for star singers, a very common practice in Bollywood. Many times, a young artist got what he thought was a break, only to find out that the music director had re-recorded the song in someone else’s voice as the final release. Many singers are heart broken but Kavita ji had a unique perspective on that.
Hema Malini’s mother took the young Kavita to meet the popular music directors Lakshmikant Pyarelal. They asked her to sing, and she sang a Lata Mangeshkar song.
“There was no news from them for about four or five years and suddenly out of the blue I got a call saying that Lata ji cannot come to the studio. We have a recording in two days’ time. So can you come to Lakshmikant ji’s house tomorrow for a rehearsal? I reached there, I rehearsed the song and they said ‘Look, we must tell you the truth. It won’t stay in your voice. It will be Lata ji’s song. But we need a female voice for the film shooting because the actress can’t emote unless there is the song in a female voice. So, are you agreeable about singing a song which is called a “dubbing?”’
I said ‘Certainly! This is like a training ground for me. Where else can I learn how to sing a film song if not from you?’ And then there was always a 180 members orchestra. We would have people like Hari Prasad Chaurasia ji, Shiv Kumar Sharma ji, Zarin Daruwalla as part of musicians. These fantastic musicians and, 40-50 violins, 20 percussionists, other instruments along with Lakshmikant Payarelal ji teaching you how to sing was an amazing experience. I started dubbing songs for Lata ji, in 1978-79 out of which one song “Kahe ko Babul” in the movie”Mang Bharo Sajna” was kept in my voice. And of course I met other great music directors after that. But now looking back, I feel so blessed. I made music because I loved music. I was able to sing jingles, someone was calling me to sing bhajans, or shlokas from the Bhagwat Gita. I was doing concerts all over the world with Manna Dey.” Kavita ji also sang with Talat Mehmood, Mukesh ji, and Mahendra Kapoor ji in concerts in the early years. Her aunt was her main caretaker and Kavita ji says her life was full of music, going to college, music practices, concert tours. She was surrounded by positive, helpful people and positive experiences.
“There was a torchlight from God guiding me, telling me now you must turn left and now you must turn right. I had no time to think of anything negative. I had a happy go lucky nature and I met the most wonderful people, singing for Jaidev ji, learning music from different people, including Pandit Ram Narayan, a little bit from Pandit Jasraj ji, Manas Mukherjee, Shaan’s father, Gautam Mukherjee and everyone was so positive. I was being showered with love and affection from everybody around me. I was always protected by my aunt. I was very naive, and I was not over ambitious. A couple of music directors have told me that, you know, if you had somebody like Lata ji in front of you who was willing to sing your songs, would you look at any other singer? I agreed with them.”
“Lataji was like a guru to me, and I was so grateful I dubbed songs for her. And your guru can never be a competition. The challenging work and struggle Lata ji and Asha ji put to reach where they did, and to remain at the top for decades, is so incredible. To have such constant dedication and focus trying to balance your personal and professional life, especially Asha ji, is no mean task.”
“Even when I used to dub for Lata ji and for Lakshmikant Pyarelal, never did I have the arrogance to think, ‘Oh I hope Lata ji doesn’t sing and this song stays in my voice.’ I would only hope that I had done some justice to the beautiful composition. Sometimes I used to feel embarrassed and say, ‘Oh my God, how can I even think of singing this song?’ Even when I got “Love story,” the first thing I asked Pancham Da (RD Burman) was, ‘Are you sure you want me to sing the song, because after Bandini, after a long time, you’ve got a subject like that. Do you want Lata ji to sing this song? Are you absolutely sure you want me to sing? You’ve given me such a nice song.’ He scolded me and said, ‘I’ve called you to sing this song. Stop overthinking like this. Now you work hard, follow me, do what I ask. You WILL sing this song.'”
I recall Manna Dey telling me in an interview that initially he was concerned that Kavita ji did not have that generic voice that would fit every actress, but he was pleasantly surprised that her voice evolved in a way that it did blend beautifully with the persona of many top actresses. What advice did he give her?
“He was always very, very encouraging. He would tell me you must listen to Lata Ji, learn the composition but use your own voice. And that’s what happened on stage when we were on tour. I had to sing all the duets that he has sung with Lata Ji and Asha Ji. Asha ji has sung very, very high-pitched songs and I never felt I could hit those high notes. So, it was important to learn but retain your own voice and sing the way one felt most at ease. Those days, when I used to sing Lata ji’s and Asha ji’s songs on tour with Manna Da, I used to get good applause. Manna Da used to talk so nicely about me before I came up on stage. He made sure that either he or the emcee mentioned that I was from a good family, an educated girl. So when I walked on stage and sang my four songs I was always made to feel welcome by the audience. And then the moment I used to sing duets with Manna Da, people loved it. I remember my first tours in US and other countries were very successful tours and I really enjoyed myself.”
“But later, of course, things changed for me when I sang Hawa Hawai. When you start singing your own song, the confidence level changes because it’s your own song and so now the way you interpreted it becomes a reference point for anyone who sings it after you.”
“Having said that, let me tell you that starting off with singing somebody else’s song is fantastic practice. Especially when it is a legend. I didn’t have a Lata ji-like voice. But for me to be able to sing all the same gamak (deep ornamentation) the same embellishments, was a wonderful way of enhancing my own abilities. I remember when I went to sing for C Ram Chandra ji, the very first song he taught me was‘Mohabbat aisi dhadkan hai.‘ He told me to emote as if the audience was my children and I am teaching them every emotion and making them understand the song and its depth. I realized how much Lata ji had imbibed the essence of what C Ramchandra had said to me while teaching me to dub that song. Lata ji did that for every musician, no matter who it was. As did Asha ji. In fact, one song that I hear again and again, and cannot imagine anyone else singing it, is Ai -Dil-E-Nadaan composed by Khayyam sahib. He was also a very good singer. Ai-Dil-E -Nadaan is one song which nobody in this world can sing, the way Lata ji sang it. Nobody. Even the greatest singer in the world, unless it is a divine being from above, cannot sing it like Lata ji.”
“So even when you are dubbing, you learn so much from every composer and a renowned artist like Lata ji. It is very good training practice. I also feel that Lata ji, Asha ji, Sonu Nigam, Sunidhi Chauhan, they can really recreate any instrument in their voice. They sing everything a brilliant composer has in his mind and manifest it. An example is the songs of Anuradha, composed by Pandit Ravi Shankar. You can hear the sitar in Lata ji’s voice. Manna Da told me that you must remain a student of music all your life, Kavita. You should never feel you’ve learned enough.”
I told her I was impressed by the way she sings “Tuhi Re” and on one occasion I saw her husband, the legendary violinist Dr L. Subramaniam, listening completely mesmerized. And if you have seen them perform the same song together it is equally mind-blowing.
“You know he is really most encouraging. At times I am hard on myself and will say things like “I can’t sing this or that”. And he is always telling me, “Please don’t be negative about yourself because you have your own strength and you don’t know it. You’re not aware. It’s okay to be unaware, but don’t be negative because what you have, other people don’t have.”
“For me to be a musician and to feel I have achieved a lot is really not possible because I’m living with somebody who reads and lives on music 24 hours a day even when he’s not performing. He is sitting and writing orchestral compositions till 3:30 in the morning. He is the only Indian whose orchestral work has been published by Schott Music in Germany which also publishes Beethoven, Bach and all the Symphony orchestras. And he has authored a book on violin pieces for Trinity College, released his music book. And so much more. He’s so hard working that I can never say, ‘Oh, I’m too tired.’ From morning till night this man just works. There are times he will say my concert is coming up. I’ve not had enough practice. And he starts practicing. I remember one time his shoulders were aching. He’s had a slight pain in the hip. But he sat down inside, playing for two hours. Then he got up and then he decided, you know, that this composition must be completed. And started again.”
“So when you live with somebody who is working so hard, it’s very inspiring because there’s no way can you say that, ‘Oh, I have done enough practice or I’ve done enough songs.'”
“Another artist I adore is Madhurani. She is among my idols as a human being and as a singer. If you praise her, she will quickly change the topic and attribute everything to the blessings of her gurus. You think of Nikhil Banerjee, you think of the woman who never stepped out of her door, Annapurna Devi, and still left such a huge legacy. Once one of my teachers secretly recorded a session of hers and made me hear it privately and I was blown away. Where can you ever feel any arrogance about your own music when you meet or experience the work of such great artists?”
I asked Kavita ji to share some stories of the stalwarts with whom she has worked. I found out in my research that she had even worked with Talat Mahmood.
“I met Talat Sahib for the first time in Manna Da’s house. They were very close friends. And Manna Da said to him that I sing very well. ‘You should take her to sing in concerts with you.’ Talat Sahib’s son Khalid was also in College in Xaviers. And then Talat Sahib called me. I can’t recollect which was the first concert I sang with him, but it was at Shanmukhananda Hall, and I sang 2-3 duets with him. I had to turn down a few concerts with him and with many others because in between college, I was so busy singing with Manna Da. But I did sing a few times with Talat Sahib. He was a quiet man, and he wouldn’t talk very much. He embodied Lucknow. He was elegant and a gentleman.”
“I remember an incident with Hemant Kumar. I used to sing on stage with him. There was a college function happening in Mumbai, far away. And I was on a pandal (a large temporarily erected structure, that is usually decorated elaborately) And I remember there was a bat hovering around. I was very scared of bats and had heard these exaggerated stories that a bat will fly and get stuck in your hair, and it can’t be removed.”
“Hemant Da saw I was very fearful. He got rid of the bat for me, asked someone to get me a cup of tea, offered me sweets, and said ‘Don’t worry child. I am here to make sure nothing happens to you.’ He was so kind.”
“Mukesh ji was extremely charming. And I remember this one time I went to his house, as we were going to do a show in Gujarat. That’s the time he had recorded the famous song “Chanchal Sheetal,” from the film Satyam, Shivam, Sundaram. And he said, ‘Let me sing this song I recorded yesterday for Lakshmikant Pyarelal,’ and added mischievously, “But remember I am not as trained a singer as Manna Dey.’ He was so warm and loving. He would always call everyone “darling’ and make sure we had been served tea, food, backstage. I used to be quiet as a mouse, in awe of many of these great legends. But now when I look back, I remember these little acts of kindness and how lovely they were.”
What about the great Kishore Kumar?
“Hema ji’s mother Jaya aunty, and my aunt took me to Kishore Da’s house. We were there for 2-3 hours, and he fed us fabulous poori sabzi and sweets. Then he was told that I sing. He looked at me and he said, “Do you know any of my songs?” I was very scared and nervous and said I like your songs especially “Mere Naseeb mein”. He said ‘Okay sing that.’ I was this timid mouse when it came to singing in front of people. I was very comfortable in a recording studio, but very nervous of public singing. That nervousness continued for many, many years. I sang Mere Naseeb mein, nervously and sang a wrong note. He told me, “Go hear the song again, and correct the note.’ He sang that one line for me. What I had sung was the difference between a major and minor note. Kishore Da sang without the microphone for me and my God, what singing! I was transported to heaven. But that was my first meeting with him. The next meeting was where Anuradha Paudwal and I sang a few lines with him. But then later I sang the song from the film “Karma” Na Jaiyo Pardes” that broke the ice.”
“During one of those recordings, I remember him asking me ‘When is your birthday? I hope you are not a number 8.’ I said I was born on the 25th. And he said mischievously ‘Oh you are number 7. Then it’s okay, I don’t have a good relationship with Number 8.’ I asked who is number 8 and he added mischievously, ‘That Asha, (the great Asha Bhosle who is equally mischievous.) Us se Jhagda ho raha hai aaj kal mera.” (These days I am squabbling with her)” I was lucky. Us jhagdey mein mere ko 3-4 gaaney mil gaye with him! (Thanks to that fighting I got 3-4 songs to sing with him)” Kavita ji said laughing.
In truth Asha ji and Kishore Kumar were very close friends. And Kishore Da’s son Amit Kumar told me how much both Asha ji and Lata ji helped him after his father passed away suddenly. (I will share that interview soon as well. It is among my most accessed podcasts, on Kishore Kumar’s birth and death anniversary.).
“I remember even Lata ji telling me one small story” Kavita ji said, “I don’t know which song it was. I haven’t been able to figure out, but she said in those days you had to walk slowly towards the mike as there was no reverb. Kishore Da would sing his lines and as soon as Lata ji reached the mike he would mischievously shove her, just to annoy her. He was very naughty. There was never a dull moment with Kishore da around!”
Yet, despite all the skirmishes, I tell Kavita ji, those days, when people stayed together like a family and sang and rehearsed together were wonderful. Now people sing their segments, and they are all put together in the studios, cut, and pasted. Same in films where people do many shots the same way.
“That is true. I remember Kumar Sanu had become a big star and would sing 6-7 songs in a day, and he was running around singing his segment, and moving to the next song. But Pancham Da told him “I don’t care how many songs you are singing, but you must sing the song with Kavita in person. When you come, you cannot sing your lines and run away. That’s how we sang Rimjhim together. And you can feel the energy of that personal interaction.”
Kavita ji also remembered the great Indian poet and lyricist Majrooh Sultanpuri who would be at the studio early for Khamoshi. “In fact, we were both the earliest to arrive. He was so famous and he could have taken it easy. But he would make me understand the lyrics, how to pronounce words by taking the character’s background into account. Seeing my respiratory allergies he would suggest Ayurvedic remedies. He was, like others, kindness personified.”
It brought us then to that moment when Rafi Sahib apologized to Kavita ji, stunning her with his humility.
I told Kavita ji that while she has obviously had a sound training, I have felt that when I listen to her voice, there is a soul consciousness and I noticed it especially in this song from the film Ladies Tailor where Rafi Saab sang most of the song and Kavita ji only had 4 lines, but she sang each line so differently with such subtle nuances. There was something special happening there.
Kavita ji said “I honestly did not pay such an in-depth attention as you, but funny you are talking about that song. Most people would not have even heard of it recently. But I was in a different state that day.”
“Rafi Sahib was such an extraordinarily positive person and as he stood there in the recording chamber, that room was radiating with positive energy. I landed up there and Lakshmikant ji said ‘Please don’t make a sound and sit quietly because Rafi Sahib is already recording and we don’t want to distract or disturb him. Just listen to him.’ So, I sat there listening. I think there are three antras (verses) and every time Rafi sahib would sing beautifully, but make a mistake in the second line of the second antra, and the whole recording would start again. So three retakes happened in front of me. He was singing so beautifully, but he would come to the second antra, and he would stumble on that line. This was at Mehboob studio. Then Lakshmikant ji came and said ‘Let me open the door and ask Rafi sahib aap ko phir se yaad karva doon (Should I help you memorize the line again?)’ When he asked, Rafi Sahab said ‘Haan main atak raha hoon yahan par (yes, I am getting stuck here).’
So Lakshmikant ji sang those lines 2-3 times for him and Rafi Sahab memorized it. Then again, they started the take and Rafi Sahab completed the song beautifully and the take was okayed. Then Rafi turned around and he saw me. I was really a non-entity. And if you had seen me in those days, you would have realized I was very shy. I would talk to my friends, and I was a chatter box with my family, but I used to hesitate with others. I used to speak mostly in English; I couldn’t speak Hindi very fluently. And I was also not very into dressing up or trying to be an attention seeker. I never had too much makeup on, neither was I very smartly dressed. I was just like a middle class South Indian girl or a Bengali girl, sitting around self-consciously. And Rafi Sahab, turned towards me, he folded his hands and said‘Main aap se mafi chahata hoon. Meri wajah se ap ko itni der yaha baithna padh raha hai. (I ask your forgiveness. Because of me you have had to sit here for so long.)’
“Can you imagine? The legend Mohammad Rafi asking for forgiveness from me! I was trembling. I said ‘Rafi Saab, meri khushnaseebi hai ki main aap ko baith ke sun rahi hoon. I can’t tell you, Main kaun si paradise main hoon, (It is my good fortune that that I can sit here and hear you sing. I can’t tell you which Paradise I am in).’
“After he finished and then when I sang those 4 lines, I was in a different mental state. It was like the world is so beautiful, where am I? How lucky am I? I don’t know how I sang those lines. I don’t even know how I finished it because initially I was in tears. I couldn’t believe that I had met this farishta (divine messenger of God). All these great men were like that.”
Kavita ji also has had to battle severe respiratory and bronchial infections for years. The clip I’m sharing below was recorded here in Boston and I had been witness to how unwell she was, just prior to stepping on the stage.
“I’ve always suffered chronically from colds. Earlier it was tonsillitis, then colds which slowly turned into bronchial infections. I would not be well during some of my best recordings. In fact, I would be sick throughout the year for all these years, but have been able to pull it all off. God has been so kind. He has allowed me to sing through all this ill health when perfectly fit people have not had the opportunity to either meet, sing with, or sing for such great people. That’s where I think God has brought me into this line for some purpose. Without God’s help and blessings of the elders in my family, I wouldn’t have been able to achieve anything.”
I will be back with Part 2 of my conversation with Kavita Krishnamurti Subramaniam.
Happy birthday Kavita ji. May you continue to enthrall us with your voice and make many melodious memories for years to come.
My gratitude to Nitesh Jain. Photo credit: respective photographers.
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